Teaching is Like Gardening

I'm starting to realize that teaching is like gardening. All grow best in different conditions. Some are shy and want to stay in the shade. Some need to be in the light all the time. Some are just beginning to bloom and you can’t get carried away in trying to prune them too quickly. Some are hardy, with firmly established roots, and do best if you leave them alone. Others only thrive with vigilant attention. All were created to be just who they are. Accepting who and where they are is the only way to help them grow.

New Year's resolutions

Do you ever have a moment where you’d like to walk up to who you were ten years ago and take that person by the shoulders and say, “Wake up!”

I just had one of those moments. I was just remembering something my host mom Isabelle said when I lived in Paris for a semester my junior year of college. Isabelle was a teacher in her mid-30s and the mother of a cherubic two-year-old named Tomas. One afternoon in mid-April she sat me down over a cup of tea. Her husband Didier (my host dad) was still at work. Isabelle immediately started stammering so passionately that it startled me at first. I thought maybe I had accidentally broken the shower hook thing again. But that wasn’t it.

“Metadeet...(that’s how she said my name) Metadeet! Il faut que tu sors!”
(Meredith, it is necessary that you go out.)

“Avec tes amis!”
(With your friends.)

I was immediately offended and replied quickly:
“N’inquiete pas que je n’ai pas des amis!”
(Do not worry that I don’t have friends!)

She went on to tell me that I needed to expand my horizons. I was living in a city of amazing culture and beauty and needed to immerse myself in every opportunity and experience possible.
I remember at the time feeling very offended. I had thought I was doing pretty well. I was making friends from around the globe, attending my Sorbonne classes regularly, going to the cinema and the park to practice my French with my Polish friend Ana, and merrily going along with my American classmates on all those excursions to museums, the opera, the ballet, the parks, the gardens, the chateaux, etc. Every week it was something new. We went all over the place. I went to coffee shops, book shops, patisseries. I navigated the Metro. I went to every Impressionism museum twice and must have gone to the Louvre five times. I was even getting ready to go on trips with friends to the south of France, Italy and Spain.

Wasn’t that all enough? What more did this lady want from me? I thought I had seen it all and experienced everything.
What I realize now that she was trying to get across was there I was, living in PARIS, the City of Lights, one of the most amazing and beautiful places on the planet, for four whole months. Without parental supervision! Yet most every afternoon after school I would simply take the Metro ride back to their suburban home, shut the door to my room, turn on my Walkman and work on my homework, since French didn’t come easy for me. And so what if I called Mom from the pay phone every Monday at noon sharp? No one else needed to know about that.
I realize now that Isabelle was trying to get me to wake up and seize the moment.
She was trying to let me know that this kind of chance wouldn’t come along again. She wanted me to seize every opportunity possible to make the experience meaningful and wonderful. I wish I had listened more.

That’s what I’m trying to remember as a New Year’s resolution in 2009:
Il faut que je sors.
It is necessary that I go out… whether rediscovering my own surroundings or exploring new ones. Not just to see something to say I saw it and leave, but to really soak it up, stay awhile, and attempt to have a meaningful experience.
So it may be a decade too late, but thanks, Isabelle.

state of shock

I just would like to state that it's 4:07 pm on Wednesday the 17th of September and I have not a single paper to grade. For the first time in three weeks I am actually caught up. Needless to say, I am in a state of minor shock and am not quite sure how to handle this euphoria. I'm going to meet my friend Lori for Thai and will try to refrain from dancing on the tables. This brief period will not and cannot last so I am just trying to revel in it and be grateful for it while I can.

Just wanted to share.

To Ned in Toledo and Gladys in Ontario...thank you for reading.

Gangsta's paradise

So I finally decided to listen to my Aunt Kris in Arizona. Over the years she has faithfully read and responded to every one of my long mass email anecdotes with enthusiasm and support, repeatedly saying she wished I'd write a book.
So, I'm writing a book.
I love teaching, I love learning, and I love writing, so I'm combining the three. The book is going to be a compilation/extension of this otherwise abandoned blog as well as a few of my random "teaching moments" emails to friends and family. I now have approximately 98 pages of a rough draft that I printed out and put into a a 3-ring binder last spring. I was supposed to devote some time to working on it this summer. Did that happen? No. The summer has instead been filled with going on runs, catching up with friends, traveling, camping, hiking, reading, journaling, trying out new recipes, helping Steve in his yard, planting perennials & container gardens, and then some more reading. And some very piddly freelancing. As for that 3-ring binder, it has just sat there. Like an old forgotten teddy bear. Just marinating. Is that how you spell marinating? Or is it marinading? I never know. I’m an English teacher, I should know this. Anyway, Steve is the only one I have let see the book so far and he has made some very helpful revisions/suggestions but I’ve still got a long way to go. I guess I’m just overwhelmed by the density, complexity and responsibility of crafting a BOOK. A whole book.

Anyway, in this hilarious and extremely realistic movie that came out a few months ago called Chalk, created in the faux-documentary style of the TV show “The Office," they cite a dismal statistic… something along the lines of 50% of teachers in America quit within their first three years. I think that’s sad and unnecessary.

So basically the purpose in my writing this book is to help rookie teachers navigate through all the various "waters" of the teaching world, and yes, I am indeed gonna go ahead and use a whitewater rafting analogy. Because teaching is a lot like that. First of all, you absolutely, positively must wear a life jacket. And you're going to get completely worn out if you try to do it yourself. And the waters are often scary, unpredictable, thrilling, inspring, beautiful, rocky and at times, even dangerous. You have to look ahead and know what's coming so you can be prepared. There are times you accidentally fall out of the boat, and it’s quite embarrassing. But you have to climb back in, arms flailing and all, and keep paddling instead of being carried downstream. You have to know when to paddle and when to put the oars down to let the water do the work.
The book is definitely not going to be preachy advice, because I certainly don’t know everything and still have a whole lot to learn. Instead, I am trying to make it a realistic portrait of teaching—making clear that it's not as pretty and tidy as they make it out to be in education courses you took in college, or in the orientation seminars and pedagogy manuals, or even in student teaching. It's all the things new teachers should know so that they won't be naive and Pollyannish like I was. It's what they should know so that they WON'T give up and quit, or make dumb choices that get them in trouble, or get burnt out before they have a chance to really even start. It's full of all the things I wish I'd known: anecdotes, mistakes I've made and learned from, trials and challenges... but in the end all the reasons that teaching is so wonderful and rewarding if persevered with a little bit of patience, ingenuity and faith. And a heck of a lot of hard work.
For the title I considered something like “10 Things I wish I Knew Before I Started Teaching” but then that sounded too Maria Shriver-ish. Then I realized that the whole thing in its entirety is really all the "gifts" my students have given me over the past three years. And I’m not talking about the literal gifts they bring, like Starbucks gift cards (although these ARE some of the “perks” of teaching... pun intended!) I’m talking about the intangible gifts... even if they didn’t look like gifts at the time...the many things I've learned about them, me and the practice of teaching through their insights, creativity, honesty, talent, humor and brilliance. I've also learned a lot from their apathy, boredom or lack of motivation. It taught me something about accountability, responsibility and higher expectations and standards. Even when they drove me crazy or I drove them crazy, I learned something. Somehow those mistakes have transformed into tools, and I feel a duty to share them with others. So I’ve decided to take the Steinbeck quote from this blog and am going to call the book Captured Fireflies.

But back to why this post is called Gangsta’s Paradise. The English teacher Michelle Pfeiffer portrayed in that movie Dangerous Minds actually exists... her name is LouAnne Johnson and she is still a teacher. She has written several books and she pretty much rocks. One is called Teaching Outside the Box that I happened to buy last spring without realizing she was the author. I got halfway through it in one sitting, mainly because of her overall philosophy of grabbing students by their brains, bending instead of breaking, and working smarter instead of harder.
So because I believe in "carpe diem" and that that there's no harm in asking, even if the answer could very well be no, I wrote her an email the next day, told her I loved her book, and said I knew it was a long shot but would she maybe be interested in reading a draft of my book? Then a few hours later guess what came...an email back with a subject line of "send it on." I was so excited that she agreed to read it. But now I am stuck in procrastination mode because I want it to be as perfect as possible before she looks at it. I guess I need to remember that there’s an overarching, higher purpose in writing this and hopefully that will keep me going. For any teachers who are feeling hopeless, stressed or burned out, I want this book to in some way be entertaining while also turning their perspective around by giving them hope and a different attitude.

I mean, after all... 50%? That's just plain wrong.

Eat Pray Love

Over the holiday break I happened to pick up the book Eat, Pray Love and couldn't put it down. If you haven't had a chance to read it, do yourself a favor and treat yourself to it...
I recently sent an email to the author, Elizabeth Gilbert, about how I wish I had enough money to book her as a guest speaker in my Creative Writing class this spring, but will have to settle for sharing her advice from her website. She actually took the time to send a response--albeit an auto blanket email that she sends to everyone--but it was so cute and gracious that it was as good as a personal response.

Best of all, she compared books to babies, which is exactly what I tell my students all the time and they laugh at me. Now I can tell them I'm not the only one.

Web-savvy students

My students are so technologically savvy.

Inspired by a very cool and very brilliant blogger/activist named Sean Coon, Cory Rich has started his own blog.

Inspired by an extra credit assignment I gave to the class (and her own ingenuity), Chiara von der Goltz has created her very own and (quite entertaining) myspace page for Emily Dickinson.


As for me, I just learned how to use the hyperlink button. Making huge strides.

we need more Attici

Why aren't there more Atticus Finches in the world? We need someone to say: "real courage is ... when you know you're licked before you begin but you begin anyway and you see it through no matter what."

To Kill a Mockingbird was Harper Lee's first and only novel. She hit a home run and believed she could never top it, so she quit while she was ahead.

What a cool lady.

the student discovery of the blog

It's happened...today my AP 11th graders discovered that I have a blog.
They are going to kill me because I haven't written anything about them.
That is because they keep me so busy that I don't have time to blog anymore.
But I still love them.

the in-class movie solution to Romeo & Juliet

I am very picky about which movies I show in class. If I am going to show any at all, they must be illuminating, informative, meaningful and captivating. Their purpose is not to simply fill time. (I mean, what kind of teacher would just pop a video in while she sits behind her desk to relax, grade papers, check email or plan lessons....certainly never me! Gosh!)
In order to discern if a film fits the bill, my test is whether or not I actually want to come out from behind my desk and watch the movie with them or not. If I wouldn't sit through it, I don't make them sit through it. For example, when my seniors were studying themes of the hero, the supernatural, courtly love and chivalry in British Lit last semester, the media center choice was a dreadful 1950s Arthurian legend remake with Ava Gardner that only served to bore them to tears. So I opted instead for The Princess Bride.



Now that we are studying Romeo & Juliet with the freshmen, I've been in a quandary about what to show them. In semesters past (all two of them), I have tried showing excerpts from the 1968 version of the movie (outdated, overacted and melodramatic) and the 1996 Leonardo DiCaprio version (a personal favorite, but many parts are too violent, controversial or traumatic for the innocent eyes of my freshmen.)

So this past Friday, I came to a far more entertaining, engaging and creative solution: the multiple Academy Award winning Shakespeare in Love. Modern enough for them to relate, yet not so fresh out of the theatres so as to become Harry Potter-esque, it's a behind-the-scenes/could-have-happened tale of how "Will" may have come to write (as well as perform in) his legendary play about that ill-fated, star-cross'd pair. With a stellar cast, impeccable direction, magical acting and a witty storyline, the movie is a dream. It also includes relevant historical/literary tidbits to further enlighten my precious ones. They got a huge kick out of seeing the fictional Shakespeare's inspiration unfold, and they amazed even themselves with the insightful connections they were able to make between the plot of the actual play and the film's events.

The movie is not without its PG-13 rated scenes, but those are quickly remedied with a prudent click of the "fast forward" button on the remote control.

Laughter abounded, a few tears were shed, and at the end of the movie, I thought I heard a collective classroom sigh.

This may even beat Dead Poets Society.

O'Henry, Wordsworth, Tex & Shirley

Today was the seniors' last day. This morning at 6:45 am eight of them showed up for our last day ceremony. Humble, wise, cool, grandfatherly Jack Tesh, who teaches next door, is every student's favorite, and seems to have his ever-present camera at every event, invited us to join in his senior sendoff tradition of reading aloud a sonnet at sunrise, then afterwards going out for all-you-can-eat pancakes at Tex & Shirley's.
So at 6:47 am, I rolled in (later than my own students, silver travel mug of coffee in hand) and we walked downtown together to the corner of Elm and Bellemeade to the O'Henry statue to meet Mr. Tesh. After he took their pictures, Mr. Tesh then read aloud "Composed upon Westminster Bridge," Wordsworth's sonnet that celebrates sunrise in the city :

Earth has not anything to show more fair:/
Dull would he be of soul who could pass by/
A slight so touching in its majesty; /
This City now doth, like a garment, wear /
The beauty of the morning; silent, bare, /
Ships, towers, domes, theaters, and temples lie /
Open unto the fields, and to the sky; /
All bright and glittering in the smokeless air. /
Never did sun more beautifully steep /
In his first splendor, valley, rock, or hill; /
Ne'er saw I, never felt, a calm so deep! /
The river glideth at his own sweet will: /
Dear God! the very houses seem asleep; /
And all that mighty heart is lying still!

How to break up a high school fight (This is pure genius!)

Here it is---the breakthrough high school teachers have been waiting for regarding how to handle school fights!

According to the experts from the Better Teaching® (Secondary Edition) newsletter, temper "flare-ups" can often occur in late spring as the end of the school year approaches. Yes, just like pollen and sidewalk weeds, apparently these adolescent flareups are a normal and natural part of seasonal change and are to be expected.
But what's the high school teacher who doesn't want to be stabbed to death left to do? Well, no need to break a nail, sweetie. Here are some real pro tips that will have that fight broken up in no time!
Following are the tips to heed. But they come with fair warning: put your sunglasses on because this information is so brilliant it's blinding!



DIRECTIONS FOR BREAKING UP A SCHOOL FIGHT:


#1: Loudly and firmly tell violent or potentially violent students to stop at once......


(Okay. So THAT's the trick...to tell them LOUDLY and FIRMLY. Geez, what a concept! After all this time of whispering "Honey, could you please put that handgun away?" ....who'd a thunk?) .....


#2: Separate students and get offenders to the office once the behavior stops ....
(again, should be another piece of cake) ......


***If the behavior continues:****


(Wait, the behavior is going to continue? Come on, we not only already to told them to "stop at once" but we did so both loudly AND firmly. If that doesn't make them shake in their boots, what will?) .......


#3: Immediately send someone to get an administrator. ......
(Naturally a loud, firm one, I presume?) ......


#4: Firmly direct other students to clear the area at once. .....
(Another request that will undoubtedly be met with swift compliance.) .......


#5: Do not insert yourself physically into a violent situation in any way. ......
(But what if one of the scufflers has a stray piece of lint on his jacket that needs to be removed? Okay, okay, it's that silly parental instinct in us teachers-- what can we say? Eh-hem, sorry. FIRM. Think firm!) .......



#6: Keep talking and urging students to stop their behavior before it escalates. Keep your voice low and calm until help arrives.......

(So that's obviously the ticket: keeping the voice low and calm. Should work wonders, thanks for the advice! Amidst the shouts, yells, hoots, hollers and general pandemonium of a high school fistfight, speaking low, calm and continuously so as to be perceived as a schizophrenic who wandered in to watch the fight from off the street will obviously make ALL the difference!) .....

Well, speak of the devil, there's a fight breaking outside my room at this moment. But armed with these tips, I thankfully know how to handle it now. Hey, it's been nice knowing ya! Don't forget to write me in the emergency room!

"Mad, bad and dangerous to know"

Lord Byron. Aka the devastating charmer/misunderstood soul. He definitely had the whole gamut of problems: a clubfoot, exile from his country, a Grecian nationalist resurgency to lead.
Maybe one day I could name my son Byron. Whenever I like an author/poet for some reason I think about naming my son after them....Walt, William, Henry...your basic Transcendentalists/ Romantics.
All but Percy. Lord help.

Jim Burke

I've been reading through this book that the curriculum facilitator at my school lent to me last week. It has some really useful stuff. He's honest and passionate and writes in non-technical language.

Honey over Hand

Discovered the first caricature of me drawn by a student. I have arrived.
One of my freshmen drew it. He and I usually have a relatively good rapport...he's your typical jaded 15 year old: still has a little baby fat and a lisp, loves to listen to metal, once threw his bookbag across the room for no apparent reason.
I was sitting at the overhead at the front of the class and we had all been joking around, learning productively, etc. He was doodling as he was taking notes and flipped his paper over, and I guess he didn't realize his little piece of artwork was in my full view.
My first reaction was actually amusement. At least it was nothing TOO derogatory-- mainly just a hastily drawn face with messy hair and the word "NEWLIN" with an arrow pointing to me.
Now previously, alot of my students have always said I remind them of Miss Honey from the movie Matilda. They assured me it was a compliment, and I took it, albeit she does seem a little too overenthusiastic about Keds. So that's why this new caricature came as a bit of a shock. When did I become crazed, tyrannical, one word "Newlin"? What happened to Miss Honey? Am I turning into Mr. Hand from Ridgemont High?
So to address the situation, all I did was pause in the middle of discussing the word "clemency," eye his paper with a slight smile and give him a "what was that for?" kind of look (a la Miss Honey; see pic below for illustration.) He could read my expression and said aloud, "What?" in his usual defensive stance, then turned over his paper as if noticing his drawing for the first time. His face turned immediately red and out of the corner of my eye I saw him slowly crossing the picture out and ripping up the paper. Then he casually walked across the room and threw it in the trash.
I don't know what he felt guilty for. I look at it as a rite of passage- the first caricature. I even think Miss Honey would agree.

barbaric YAWP

Whenever I show my favorite movie, Dead Poets Society in class there is nothing better than the hypnotized, smiling expression on the kids' faces while they are watching it. I love to see how much they enjoy it.

the dream seat

These two grad students at a local college came into my class today to talk to the seniors about tips on presenting their senior projects. The "Senior Project" is a relatively new, complex, lengthy graduation requirement that is the bane of their existence and mainly serves as senioritis prevention.
The girls presenting seemed very smart, sweet and friendly. When they presented I first acted as a facilitator, but they were doing such a great job and I could see how much they were enjoying leading the group that I decided to just sit to the sidelines and work on lesson plans, and let them lead the class. All I would do was look up and smile every now & then or remind the kids to listen.
It was a nice break but at the same time I felt a little jealous and left out. I mean, I am supposed to be the one who jokes around with them best. They're my babies. I am the one who knows them and pushes them to try their hardest. The girls did such a wonderful job that I guess it's kind of like how a mom must feel when her kids really like the babysitter...it's a good thing that they are in good hands but it makes you a little hurt in a way at the same time. It was hard to give them up for a day.
After the class left the girls went on and on about how much fun they had and what a great group of students they were. They actually didn't seem like they wanted to leave. I just kinda chuckled to myself because that's when I realized something. Despite the cliches about high school students being so difficult and dangerous and moody, the secret truth is that they're really NOT. The secret truth is that after just 70 minutes of being around them, you don't want to leave. Despite the occasional stress, frustration, confusion and heartache they can cause, theirs is an awesome journey of discovery, joy, laughter and wonder- and I get to be a part of it every day. And I get paid for it! This is the dream seat.

Parker Palmer

The day before I started teaching, an enthusiastic AP English teacher two trailers over told me that I should really read this amazing book called The Courage to Teach- written by a Quaker named Parker Palmer. I have been really influenced by his book and it has answered questions I didn't even realize I had. Also, after having an epiphany one day in class, I decided to email Mr. Palmer himself and he replied with a prompt and gracious response. All the more reason to be a fan of this great book.